Me, wondering whether I should pay for Rooby to participate in weekly Pizza Day at school: Rooby, do your friends eat pizza on Pizza Day, and do you want to eat pizza too?
Rooby: Well, on Wednesday we have Pizza Day, and after that we have Chocolate Milk Day.
Me: And do a lot of your friends have pizza and chocolate milk on those days?
Rooby: Yes, but not me, because we don’t celebrate those days.
Rooby: Baba, you’re not making the kind of fort I want to make. Are you making the kind of fort I like or the kind of fort YOU like? Well, I kind of like this kind of fort…. I now like two kinds of forts: one with two chairs and one with three chairs.
D: Should we come up with names for the different kinds?
Rooby: Yes. This kind is called “Ardea Herodias.” The kind with two chairs we will call a “tent.”
If there were a flock
That would be a lot of birds
And there was a flock
And a lot of birds
Me: At some point today, Rooby, we’re going to bathe you.
Rooby, suspiciously: What is “bathe”?
Me: “Bathe you” means “give you a bath.”
Rooby: Oh. I thought you meant “give me away.”
D: [sings Que Sera Sera at the top of his lungs, trying to remember the words]
Rooby: Are we almost there?
D: What if I put an end to all my pursuits and focused my energy on becoming a voice actor?
Rooby: Baba, all this talking is making my nose hurt.
“You know, rain isn’t really garbage. So why does it rain on garbage day?”
“Do skunks know they’re skunks?”
“Do you see a tooth here? I think maybe a bone will break in my mouth and then I won’t be able to talk.”
Rooby to D when he tried to have a conversation about the ethics of fibbing in order to manipulate people: “Baba, you’re not the teacher of me.”
Rooby to D when he resorted to pointing out (erroneously, of course) that “superheroes don’t lie”: “Well, I don’t have my costume on right now.”