Just thinking.

Isn’t it strange how apathy moves in waves, as if it were a passion and not the lack of one?

I know you’re not supposed to drink when you’re depressed, but when depression manifests itself as an inability to be moved, sometimes a couple drinks help me feel it, the sadness, which is the only way out of it.

This confirms my suspicion that depression is a terrible luxury. It’s when, in the absence of tragedy, we react as if we’ve experienced one.

No one needs to worry about me or anything. I’m just having one of those times when everything is going fine, but I’m not feeling fine. You know?

5 thoughts on “Just thinking.

  1. There are times when I feel like that, so — yes, I know.

    Often, for me, a dose of Pratchett does the trick. Wodehouse often helps as well. You may have read all of Pterry, but I can’t believe you’ve finished the PGOpus.

    I just looked over at the “Currently Reading” sidebar. The Girl in the Flammable Skirt? Say on!

  2. A TERRIBLE LUXURY

    That’s a beautiful way of putting it, Lady Z, as I’m convinced that depression is actually a gift of sorts that humbles us, reminds us of our limitations, and gets us back in touch with what often gets lost in the day-to-day of things.

  3. I could write for hours on the topic of depression, but…

    …is everything going fine? If so, I am damn impressed. New cities are hard, and I have two close friends in new cities/schools (one PhD, one undergrad), and it is fucking hard on them. And you left your significant other to be in your new town, right? At any rate, I admire you for everything you do. I love my town and my job and my friends and I will never go away to a strange school again.

    So, I’m sure that me pointing out how hard your life is has really helped. Ha. Maybe I shouldn’t have chimed in.

    But you should know that I think of you and worry about your experience in a new city, especially in light of the experience of my close friends.

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